[{"TitleName":"Jimmy's Soccer Manager","Publisher":"Beyond Belief","Author":"","YearOfRelease":"1991","ZxDbId":"0002614","Reviews":[{"Issue":{"Name":"Crash Issue 96, Feb 1992","Price":"£2.2","ReleaseDate":"1992-01-16","Editor":"Lucy Hickman","TotalPages":68,"HasCoverTape":false,"FlannelPanel":"Coming to you live from CRASH Towers are:\r\n\r\nEditor: Lucy 'Hot Lips' Hickman\r\nDeputy Editor: Nick 'Get Yer Kit Off' Roberts\r\nStaff Writer: Mark 'Gas Mark 6' Caswell\r\nProduction Editor: Warren 'Technicolour Neck' Lapworth\r\nAdventures: Ian 'Gerald Kaufman' Osborne\r\nArt & Design: Charlie 'De-cherried' Chubb, Mark 'Newt' Kendrick\r\nSystems Manager: Ian 'Modest Bast' Chubb\r\nScreenshots: Michael 'Anorexic' Parkinson\r\nPublisher: Roger 'Milton' Kean\r\nAdvertisement Manager: Sheila 'Omni-present' Jarvis\r\nAdvertisement Sales Executive: George 'Cassanova' Keenan\r\nAdvertisement Production: Jo '0898' Lewis\r\nProduction: Jackie 'Memo' Morris\r\nReprographics: Rob 'I've got a brand new shower' Millichamp\r\nManaging Director: Jonathan 'Liquid Lunch' Rignall\r\nCirculation Manager: David 'Birdie-dick' Wren\r\nAccounts: Sheila 'Morticia' Adams\r\nSubscriptions: David 'Bradford and Bingley' Bingle(y)\r\n\r\nTypesetting Europress Impact, using Apple Macintosh II computers, running Quark Express and Adobe Illustrator 3.0. Printing BPCC Business Magazines (Carlisle) Ltd. Distribution COMAG, [redacted]\r\n\r\nCOMPETITION RULES\r\nThe Editor's decision is final in all matters relating to adjudication and while we offer prizes in good faith, believing them to be available; If something untoward happens we reserve the right to substitute prizes of comparable value. We'll do our very best to despatch prizes as soon as possible after the published closing date. Winners names will appear in a later issue of CRASH. No correspondence can be entered into regarding the competitions (unless we've written to you stating that you have won a prize and it doesn't turn up, in which case write to us at the address below). No person who has any relationship, no matter how remote, to anyone who works for either EUROPRESS IMPACT or any of the companies offering prizes, may enter one of our competitions. No material may be reproduced whole or in part without the written consent of the copyright holders. We cannot undertake to return anything sent into CRASH - including written and photographic material, hardware or software - unless it is accompanied by a suitably stamped addressed envelope. Unsolicited written or photo material is welcome, and if used in the magazine is paid for at our current rates. Copy published in CRASH will be edited as seen fit and payment will be calculated by the printed word rate. The views expressed in CRASH are not necessarily those of the publishers.\r\n\r\nEuropress Impact Ltd, CRASH [redacted]\r\n\r\nThis month's cover: Never Ending Story II. Cover design by Oliver Frey. Powertape inlay by Mark Kendrick."},"MainText":"Beyond Belief\r\n£3.99 cass\r\n\r\nWho's this Jimmy geezer? Jimmy Greaves? Jimmy Jones? Perhaps it's Jimmy Riddle?!\r\n\r\nNope, he's a soccer manager and he needs your help because he's crap at his job! The Kettering team have never been well known for their amazing skills so they need a bit of sorting out in true football management style.\r\n\r\nFans of management games will know the format these things take. There are a few menu screens filled with various options then lists and lists of players' names and details to be waded through each time you play.\r\n\r\nOne bonus with Jimmy's (sounds like a medical program with lots of blood and gore, doesn't it?) is you get lovely mugshots of the players when you look at their info and there's even an animated graphic of a team manager when the phone rings - amazing stuff!\r\n\r\nIn my humble (as in lowest of the low - Ed) opinion, companies should always make an effort to recreate the actual football matches in games like this, I hate it when you play the game and only get a clock counting the minutes and the odd highlight when someone scores a goal. How boring! I suppose you could argue that the reason for playing is to experience life as a football manager so don't need the flashy graphics and effects. That's only an excuse to avoid making the effort.\r\n\r\nJimmy's Soccer Manager will probably make all fans of such games jump up and down in delight. The truth is there are much better soccer management games around if you look for them - and you won't have to look far. I find looking at endless lists of names incredibly boring, but fans will always say, 'We were never being boring because we were never being bored!' Hmm, exactly, (Christ, Nick, sometimes I worry about you - Ed).","ReviewerComments":[],"OverallSummary":"","Page":"61","Denied":false,"Award":"Not Awarded","Reviewers":[{"Name":"Nick Roberts","Score":"30","ScoreSuffix":"%"}],"ScreenshotText":[{"Text":"Hmm. Seems like a nice boy!"},{"Text":"I can't accept that offer! He's worth at least £2.50 and a pickled egg!"}],"BlurbText":[],"TranscriptBy":"Chris Bourne","ReviewScores":[{"Header":"Presentation","Score":"34%","Text":""},{"Header":"Graphics","Score":"38%","Text":""},{"Header":"Sound","Score":"10%","Text":""},{"Header":"Playability","Score":"40%","Text":""},{"Header":"Addictivity","Score":"30%","Text":""},{"Header":"Overall","Score":"30%","Text":""}],"CompilationReviewScores":[]},{"Issue":{"Name":"Your Sinclair Issue 73, Jan 1992","Price":"£2.2","ReleaseDate":"1991-12-05","Editor":"Andy Hutchinson","TotalPages":92,"HasCoverTape":false,"FlannelPanel":"WHAT'S IN A NAME?\r\n\r\nLife, love and loofahs; the YS experience. So, just what's in a name we wonder?\r\n\r\nEditor: Andy (Manly) Hutchinson\r\nArt Editor: Andy (Manly) Ounsted\r\nGames Editor: James (He seized the heel) Leach\r\nStaff Writer: Linda (Serpent) Barker\r\nArt Assistant: Maryanne (Rebellion) Booth\r\nAdvertising Manager: Cheryl (Charity) Beesley\r\nProduction Coordinator: Lisa (My god is satisfaction) Read\r\nPublisher: Jane (God has favoured) Richardson\r\nPublishing Assistant: Michele (Who is like the lord?) Harris\r\nGroup Publisher: Greg (To be watchful) Ingham\r\nCirculation Director: Sue (Lily) Hartley\r\n\r\nYour Sinclair (Groovy), Future (That which is to come) Publishing [redacted]\r\n\r\nSubscriptions: Pearl (A pearl) Stokes\r\nDistribution: MMC [redacted]\r\n\r\nCover Illustration: Colin (A young dog) Jones\r\nISSN 0269 6983\r\nABC Jan-June 1991 65,444\r\n\r\nYour Sinclair is whittled out of Chinese Walnut by the same eternal twelve year olds who assemble (from Airfix kit form) Commodore Format, Amstrad Action, Amiga Format, 8000 Plus, PC Answers, PC Plus, Sega Power, Amiga Power, Amiga Shopper, Classic CD, Needlecraft, Mountain Biking UK, PC Format, Public Domain and ST Format.\r\n\r\nBut what we really want to know is... have you ever been sitting in class, felt the need to ask your teacher a question, and called him/her mum or dad?"},"MainText":"Beyond Belief\r\n£3.99 cass\r\nReviewer: James Leach\r\n\r\nHow would you like to manage a top-notch, world class international football club? Yes? Well I've got bad new for you. You can't. But don't rush off into a corner and blub like a baby that's got the windypops, you can manage Kettering instead.\r\n\r\nWhat is Kettering? Isn't it the sound of hail on a corrugated roof? Oh, it's a place in Northamptonshire. Well, some you win...\r\n\r\nAnd that's what you've got to do in Jimmy's Soccer Manager. Win, that is. You've got a crowd of nobodies collectively known as Kettering FC and you've got to beat the entire five leagues. How? By skilful management and diplomacy, that's how. Oh, and by sacking the crap people and buying better ones.\r\n\r\nAfter all, this is exactly like real life, isn't it? Just make sure your striker eats three Shredded Wheat and you can't go far wrong. I know 'cos I've seen this in an advert.\r\n\r\nIT'S A GAME OF ONE HALF\r\n\r\nThe first thing you see in JSM is the main menu. Here you select exactly what you want to do. You can look at your team, select and drop players, have a quick peep at the transfer market, pop into the bank or generally do anything that you think might come in handy. Oh, and you can also go to watch the match.\r\n\r\nWhen you get to the footbal field you, er, don't see any of the action. Instead, you get a clock ticking away the minutes 'tll the game ends. There's no half-time or anything. The guys play for a solid ninety minutes, so they're completely knackered by the end of if.\r\n\r\nIf you manage a goal, the name of the striker comes up, as does the time (in minutes) he scored. This is pretty useful for working out who the key players in your team are. When the enemy team scores, you don't get told anything about who scored it, or when. Ho hum. You probably didn't want to know anyway.\r\n\r\nAt the end of the game all the league results come up. You can call up the fifth division table too, the nattily-named Vauxhall Astra Open General Motors Conference League. You'll usually be pretty near the bottom 'cos you're so crap, but hang in there. You're bound to beat Yeovil or someone eventually!\r\n\r\nWHO'S ON THE TEAM?\r\n\r\nYour team is made up of loads of fictitious people, with one notable exception - the famous W Scribo, Nobel prize-winner, ace yachtsman, astronaut and Presidential candidate. Mr Scribo is certainly a football player of no distinction at all. So it's best to try and sell him at the first opportunity.\r\n\r\nOccasionally the phone rings. You actually get to hear this, it warbles like a cat stuck in a cupboard. If you choose to answer the old dog and bone, you might be offered a pile of dosh for one of your star players. If it's W Scribo, take the money and run. Your players are all so appalling that you'll get about £2.50, at the most a pair.\r\n\r\nJimmy's Soccer Manager falls down 'cos it's not that interactive. You don't seem to be able to train the guys, or swap their positions round on the field. Basically, you've got to wait 'til you've got the dosh to buy someone better. Most of the time you just watch all the match results and hope that Kettering get the odd win.\r\n\r\nIt's all a bit of a spectator-sport for me. I like a management sim as much as the next man (as long as he doesn't like them a great deal), but I like to be able to adjust lots of details and fiddle about with mine. (Oo-er. Ed) It's also a tad sad that you can't change the names of any of the teams or players. You're stuck with Kettering and W. Scribo, I'm afraid.\r\n\r\nThe good news is that Jimmy's Soccer Manager is a darn sight faster than most management sims. There are a few long tea-breaks while the computer has a little think, but it's no worse than other games. The control system is pretty straightforward and you don't need to memorise all the keys 'cos it tells you which ones to press.\r\n\r\nSadly, Jimmy's Soccer Managarisn't much cop. There aren't any on-screen moments of glory and the little graphic touches, like piccies the players and the guy who rings you up, are nice but they're just not enough to make the game special.\r\n\r\nI know its Christmas and everything, when robins, mistletoe and stage-coaches traditionally go out into the streets and distribute goodwill, love and Masters Of The Universe battlecruisers to all the children singing in the snow-dusted market place. Still, it'd be more than my job's worth to give JSM 100% and a bag of nuts, humbugs and yule logs. Bah!","ReviewerComments":[],"OverallSummary":"I don't expect this will score in your goal. If it does, make sure sure it's obeyed the off-side rule! (Eh? Ed)","Page":"27","Denied":false,"Award":"Not Awarded","Reviewers":[{"Name":"James Leach","Score":"51","ScoreSuffix":"%"}],"ScreenshotText":[{"Text":"Get the gen on your team by selecting each player's info screen. You also get a high-quality passport-style photo."},{"Text":"Here you see the hub of an international footballing operation, I don't think."},{"Text":"Meet the gang cos the boys are here, the boys to, erm, entertain you."},{"Text":"What's this? The Crap Results Service?"}],"BlurbText":[{"Text":"10 CHRISTMAS FOOTBALLING FACTS\r\n\r\nOn the Outer Hebrides, the population traditionally play football with a stuffed turkey just before eating it.\r\n\r\nIn 1915, the Germans and English in the First World War stopped fighting and played football together. It was a very moving moment, especially seeing as we won 4-2.\r\n\r\nPaul McCartney wrote a song about it a couple of years later. It got to number one.\r\n\r\nThe Football League don't play fixtures on Christmas Day cos it's usually too cold.\r\n\r\nThe Pools Panels sit and pull crackers and drink pope and eat After Eights instead.\r\n\r\nGary Lineker's name in Turkish means Gary Christmas. This is cos Lineker means Christmas in Turkish.\r\n\r\nIn ancient times, Christmas was a time for people who were injured to play in friendlies against other hospitals.\r\n\r\nIn really ancient times, neither Christmas nor football existed. This was before the Earth cooled.\r\n\r\nFootball and Christmas aren't linked together at all really.\r\n\r\nAnd there's no number 10 fact. They're all made up anyway."}],"TranscriptBy":"Chris Bourne","ReviewScores":[{"Header":"Life Expectancy","Score":"45%","Text":""},{"Header":"Instant Appeal","Score":"49%","Text":""},{"Header":"Graphics","Score":"24%","Text":""},{"Header":"Addictiveness","Score":"43%","Text":""},{"Header":"Overall","Score":"51%","Text":""}],"CompilationReviewScores":[]}]}]